Parenting is not for the weak....

I've been wrestling. I do it each year at this time. Wrestling with Santa. Do I keep up the pretense or do I tell them that he's not real?

Well, this year week, I was overcome with the fact that I needed to stop the charade.

We had never done a big deal about Santa. Never did presents from him, or photos or hoopla. Usually, Santa was just they guy we left cookies for on Christmas Eve. Sometimes we left oatmeal or carrots. Whatever was convenient. I was a lazy Santa. We've never done Elf on the Shelf or what have you...again, I'm lazy.

Child number one hasn't believed in a few years. She just kept up the pretense. She would say something "Santa related" and wink at me.

My little boy is real sensitive to the Spirit. He began questioning. He would say things like: "So Santa and the Holy Spirit do they talk?" "Do the elves work for God, too?" "Is the story of Rudolph real like the story of Jesus?" "IF you have presents upstairs, how does Santa bring them down the chimney?"

Trying to combine all the things was confusing them and making my job harder....

I knew I needed to tell them. If I'm their teacher 100% of the time (mom/homeschool teacher is a blurred line) than I need them to believe what I'm telling them is true. I want them to be able to trust me more than ever that what I'm telling them is truth and that they can believe me 100% of the time.

Breathe. It's only 8:30 and not enough coffee has been consumed.

I sat them down. I told them that it was a fun story based on a real guy named Nicholas but it was fiction. Fiction is fun and can be enjoyed, just like the book we've been reading "Mouse and the Motorcycle." There is something exciting about giving and enjoying the magic of the season, but Santa wasn't real. The elves weren't real. Rudolph wasn't real. JESUS was real and the Bible is true.

Tears welled up. Not in the 4 year old who takes most things in stride. But the sensitive 7 year old. He questioned the reality of it all. I read the story of Jesus' birth again. I wanted this to be the last thing they heard from me on the subject. I wanted them to be consumed by TRUTH.

I reminded them that Jesus brought the best gift of the season. The 4 year old responded with "He gave us the Holy Spirit!!"

The 11 year old said, "He gave us salvation!"

The middle two sat in silence. Pondering. Soaking it in. Re-evaluating life as we know it. Questioning it all in complete shell shocked silence. So I stopped asking questions. I stopped talking. I sat and waited.

It took forever for them to look me in the eyes. I knew that someday they would be sitting in a therapist's office saying, 'remember that week before Christmas when mom told us Santa didn't exist."

Then the first question.

"Hey, who left the crumbs last year? And the hand print the year before?"

Well, I said, who do you think did it?

In unison: DAD!!

Yes, it was your dad.

"Well, if we don't tell dad this year we know about Santa, do you think could ask to put out guacamole or a banana this year. (husband doesn't like either of those and they know it) *bursts of laughter*

They are going to be okay if they are already plotting to torment their dad.

A few days have passed. They seem fine with it. They ask questions. Which is what I want to them to do anyways.

My son is very black and white. So while listening to Christmas music when any Santa song comes on it is met with much protest.

"Santa Clause is coming to town...Santa is not coming to town because SANTA IS DEAD"

"Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer...Rudolph is fake and Santa is DEAD"

You get the idea....it's going to be a very interesting Christmas season!

I'm glad I did it.  I'm glad we can now focus in on the true meaning of the season. But this parenting gig is not for the weak or faint of heart!